


I Want To Help

by misguided_joy



Category: Servamp (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Depression, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Out of Character, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-27
Updated: 2018-11-30
Packaged: 2019-08-08 12:10:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16429148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misguided_joy/pseuds/misguided_joy
Summary: Mahiru is 16 years old and someone who likes things to be simple. He has a group of friends who he hangs out with daily, trouble never seemed to stir within them. Until one person starts to act differently.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: THIS ENTIRE STORY WILL HAVE THEMES SUCH AS SELF HARM AND DEPRESSION! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!  
> Hey guys :) Thanks for choosing to read this Servamp fanfiction. Please make sure you have read the trigger warning above ^^ This story will be a bit different from my other ones because it will focus on a more serious subject so yeah, enjoy.

* * *

My name is Mahiru. I am 16 years old and I like things to be made simple. I have a group of friends I hang out with daily and we never seem to not get along. I appreciate having them as comrades and I would trust them with my life. I can't remember the last time any of them broke my faith anyway.

* * *

"Kuro! Get up you lifeless lump of blue!" I tugged on my friend Kuro's arm. He had spent the evening last night to do homework but he didn't go to bed until after 2 in the morning. Such a fool. "Mahiru! Let me sleeeeeep." He groaned. I swear, if Kuro was an animal he would be a damn cat. I'd about had it by this point so I sighed and went into the kitchen to grab a bucket and water. I filled the bucket with freezing cold water and carried it to where my lazy friend was. I giggled and poured out the freezing liquid onto him. He woke up with a start and began shivering despite having a super thick coat on. "What the fuck?!" He barked at me. I fell to the floor laughing and tossed the now empty bucket his way. He evaded it but I could see he was now shivering a lot more than earlier. I started to feel bad so I got up, sighed, and took Kuro by the wrist and hauled him to the bathroom where I assisted him in drying off. "That was so cold..." My blue-haired friend whined. "Sorry, Kuro. You weren't waking up so I did the only thing I could think of at the moment." I explained as I went to grab Kuro's school uniform. As I entered my living room I noticed that Kuro left his phone on the coffee table and it was blowing up with text messages. I bit my lip as I thought about reading the messages or not. I chose not to and just picked up his bag and delivered it back to the bathroom. I knocked and Kuro opened the door. I handed him his bag and yawned. I left him to change as I prepared a light breakfast for the two of us. Five minutes later Kuro comes out, dressed in his uniform and in his mouth is a cigarette. I stared at the thing in between his lips and then at him. "Kuro? When did you pick up smoking?" I questioned my friend as he took a seat at the dining table. "I started about two months ago. It helps me calm down." Was all he said. He lit the cigarette. I sighed and walked up to him, getting a little too close but I didn't care. "Uh? Mahiru?" Kuro asked. I got down so I could look Kuro in his eyes. I saw a light pink creep onto his cheeks. I plucked the cigarette from his lips and put it out then threw it out my kitchen window. "No more smoking, Kuro," I said simply before standing back up and grabbing our plates of toast.

* * *

"Took you guys long enough. We were waiting here for 10 minutes! You're the ones who are normally early." As Kuro and I approached our meeting place with our friends, our friend Licht started nagging to us about how we are late. "Sorry but Kuro here wouldn't wake up." I groaned as Kuro just yawned it off. I shook my head in dismay but continued to walk with our other companions. "Let's hope the teacher doesn't start a whole rant about us being twenty-three minutes late to class." Misono breathed. The group stared at their short friend in shock. "Twenty-three minutes late?!" Tetsu asked with his mouth wide open. "That's gotta be inaccurate Misono! Kuro and Mahiru couldn't have taken  **that** long." Hugh added. "Afraid I'm not wrong you all. Now let's go or else we will be even later." Misono began running. Tetsu started off after him knowing he would have to help him sooner or later due to the shorties anxiety. The others followed after and all that remained were Kuro and Hyde.

* * *

 My name is Kuro. I hate troublesome things and my friends call me a lazy lump of blue due to the fact that I have dyed blue hair, a blue coat, and also blue jeans. I have a somewhat large group of friends that I hang out with daily. It consists of me, Mahiru, Hyde, Licht, Misono, Tetsu, Hugh, Lily, Misono's brother Mikuni, and also Jeje. They're a nice bunch but I'm closest with Mahiru. What a pain. 

* * *

 The group started to run to the school so not to be any later than they were. I was left with Hyde, an irritating idiot who somehow got the nickname of, hedgehog. "Why aren't you racing along with them Kuro?" He asked tugging at the fur of my coat. "It's too troublesome for me. I will rather be late. You?" I questioned him right back. "I'm too tired to mind." He yawned. I rolled my eyes and shoved my hands into the pockets of my jeans. 

_You should order him to fuck off, Kuro._

_Tell him your exact feelings._

_That way he will shun you._

_And I can keep coming back if he does._

_Isn't that glorious? Kuro~._

I shook my head attempting to get that demon voice out of it. Hyde peered at me curiously. "You alright there?" He raised one eyebrow at me. I nodded and began running to catch up with Mahiru. For some reason, he's the only one who can soothe me when I feel my demons taking power. I don't tell him but he can recognize it in my face that I don't appear like myself. 


	2. AUTHORS NOTE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> JUST AN AUTHORS NOTE FOLKS :) BUT PLEASE READ IT ANYWAY

* * *

 Hey everyone! I hope you're enjoying this story so far. (even though it only has one chapter ahahaha) But either way, I think this story will have a certain day I publish on! What day would you like me to publish on? I was thinking Sundays or Mondays ;3

* * *

Edit: 10/29/18

Hola! I am back and here to say that I will be publishing a new chapter of this story every MONDAY. If you have any questions please ask them whenever (: I will answer any of them without hesitation! See you readers on Monday ^~^ ( November 5, 2018 )

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned for the next time I publish! Bye-bye now :))


	3. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SURPRISE! I'M PUBLISHING CHAPTER 2 A DAY EARLY! <3 ENJOYYY

* * *

...Kuro's Point Of View...

* * *

 I began running faster each minute. My demon... He won't shut up!

_Kuro~_

_Cmon now, you must not be stubborn._

_I know that you want me to take over your mind and body!_

"Shut up you little evil shadow!" I shout as I fall to the ground in a pile of tears and heavy breathing. 

"Kuro?!" I hear Mahiru's voice calling out to me but I can't make out anything but that.

"Kuro! Kuro, what happened?" I hear him ask. My lips won't move. I feel numb. Damnit what do I do now?!

"Kuro... You're crying..?" I can feel my friend wiping away the few tears that made their way down my face.

"Mahiru..." I finally groan out. I feel Mahiru getting up and then I hear footsteps running away. He must be going to grab the others so they can get me to the nurse or something. That was all I thought before passing out with only my demon to keep me company.

 

When I woke up I was in the school nurses office with Mahiru sitting close by. I fluttered my eyes open and saw him with a worried look plastered onto his perfect face. I sighed. He looked my way and also sighed but his was of relief. He came closer. 

"You had me scared for a second there... After you passed out I ran to grab the others so we could bring you here. I hope you're doing better?" Mahiru started to explain.

"Hm... Much. Thanks." I gave short statements, not wanting to strain myself any more than necessary. 

"Do you think you should go home?" 

"I should be fine now. Let's go to class?"

"If you're sure..." Mahiru smiled at me as I got up. We were given a pass to the fourth period.

The walk to class was silent and longer than it should have been. We dragged our feet there. I had a feeling neither of us was happy with today's events so far.

"Kuro?" Mahiru spoke up.

"Hm?" I looked in his direction.

"What really happened? Why did you pass out so suddenly?" He lowered his head, not wanting to meet my eyes.

I sigh before giving my reply. "Well... I started to hear my demon again. It's getting worse every day. I don't-" Mahiru cut me off by pulling me into a hug. It was a gentle gesture but it felt nice. He felt like a safe place for me. I could always confide in him and not have to worry about if he told anyone about my issues or not.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there in the moment." That sentence caught me off guard.

"Why are you sorry?! It's not your fault, Mahiru." I looked him in the eyes.

"I know but... I feel bad for not being there when you needed me." He broke eye contact.

"Mahiru. Look at me." I held onto his shoulders and waited for him to comply. He slowly turned back to face me.

"It's ok. It's not your fault. Don't feel bad for something that was out of your control." I smiled. He smiled. We walked to class and that was that.


	4. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Monday! Also Happy Veterans Day <3 Enjoy the fluff in this chapter ;3

* * *

...Mahiru's POV...

* * *

As Kuro and I wandered to our fourth-period class I realized something. He was deceiving me just a second ago. He is not fine and never was fine. Why lie to me? Why go through that difficulty? Because you consider my happiness? Because..? I require answers but he won't deliver them. I huff and Kuro looks my way in a questioning manner. I smile and resume walking. It was only another moment before we entered our classroom. I opened the door and our classmates and professor peered at us. I delivered the pass over and took a seat in the center row as always. Kuro took his seat in the back row like always. It was tough to focus on the lesson when I recognized something was wrong with Kuro. Class departed without me even realizing it. I shut my eyes and sighed before standing up and gathering my books and binders. Kuro waited for me and we walked out together. The day seemed to drag on for me. During lunch, I didn't eat and all my friends seemed worried and or curious as to why. I would just smile and shrug them off. During the last period, I was doing a project with Lily and he tried to ask me a question but I was so lost in thought that I didn't even notice him waving a hand in front of my face to get my attention. So it was after the school day was over that all my friends gathered around me to ask me what was wrong.

"You were absolutely fine this morning, Mahiru," Hugh said to me.

"Hugh's right. What's altered all of a sudden?" Misono countered quickly.

"I'm fine you guys. Just have a lot on my mind. Kuro and I have to continue that assignment so we'll see you tomorrow morning." I explained before clutching Kuro's wrist and hauling him off with me to my apartment.

I understand that they care, and I'm glad for that. Some people don't get the privilege of having such good people as friends. But right now I need to talk with this lazy lump of blue alone. He has  **me** worried! His demon? It's getting worse? He's not doing alright at this moment in time and I need to know why because... Because I want to help.

* * *

 ...Misono's POV... (OMG A DIFFERENT POV FOR ONCE!)

* * *

"We can all agree he's not fine right?" I question the others. 

"Oh most assuredly!" Hugh nodded his head in response.

I groaned in irritation at our friend's unusual behavior. Tetsu, who was standing next to me, addressed the topic.

"I feel it's just a minor thing. Nothing that will last into tomorrow or anything. He has Kuro if anything occurs so let's just return to our homes." I could tell that Tetsu wasn't convinced with himself but he wanted to be. I looked at him and he looked at me. I smiled but he didn't. He just sighed and began to walk off as did the others. Before Tetsu could walk any further I grabbed hold of his hand.

"Misono?" He asked.

"Tetsu I- I have something to tell you..." I stuttered.

"Ok. Tell me then." He made it sound too fucking easy!

 "I- W- Tetsu... I like you. As something m-more than friends!" I shouted out without even realizing.

He just stood there smiling. Before I could say anything else he has captured my lips in a small but loving kiss. He wasn't too rough but wasn't too careful. His kiss felt right. It felt like a scene from a movie where the couple kissed in front of a firework show. I could almost hear those fireworks myself. Tetsu pulled away slowly leaving me shocked.

"So you finally got the courage to tell me?" He laughed.

"Y-you knew?!" I shrieked.

"Well yeah. You didn't hide it very well shorty." Tetsu wrapped me into a hug and we chuckled together at my childlike ways. 

* * *

 ...Licht's POV...

* * *

 Everybody started to disband their own ways but one person, in particular, followed me like always.

"Why must you be up my ass twenty-four seven Hyde?!" I whirled around and matched his eyes.

"Because I'm your boyfriend?" He beamed.

I rolled my eyes. "You wish hedgehog. You really wish." With that I wandered off at a walking speed I didn't know was possible. When I looked behind me I only noticed Hyde sitting on a nearby bench practically in tears. Great, now he made me feel bad for stating something like that. I rolled my eyes once more before strolling back over to him. I sat down beside him but he didn't even flinch. The two of us sat in silence for another few minutes before I got annoyed again.

"Listen here you irritating fucking hedgehog!" I began to shout until I realized something. Hyde was crying now. That's why he wasn't speaking. He didn't want me to see him cry. I breathed and made him face me. He tried tugging away but I wouldn't allow it. I looked him in the eyes and chuckled lightly. He was still sobbing so I did the only thing that would come to mind.

I leaned in and kissed his cheeks. First the right then the left. He was taken back by my actions but stayed where he was. He started to cry a bit more but this time it was joyful tears. I smiled at him and leaned in again and kissed him on the lips. The kiss was gentle but he understood what it meant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DID YOU LIKE THE FLUFF?! :O


	5. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back! So I got bored and wrote the fourth chapter after I posted the third today and since the third chapter was a little longer than usual and filled with fluff..! I am choosing to post the fourth chapter today as well since it's so short :) 
> 
> P.S: You meet Tsubaki, Belkia, and Sakuya in this part. ( Kinda )

* * *

...Kuro's POV...

* * *

"I'm going to make us some drinks but then we have to talk!" Mahiru huffed as he hauled me into his humble apartment.

"Ok? I'll go take a seat in the living room then..." I returned kinda confused as to what we needed to address.

I walked into the living room and plopped onto the couch. Not a moment later did Mahiru march in with two mugs filled with steaming apple cider tea. ( A/N: I only put that because it's my favorite kind of tea tehe ) He placed my cup onto a coaster then placed his down next to it. He took a seat and gave me the "we need to talk right now mister" mother look. I raised an eyebrow at my friend before he finally caved in and started off our conversation.

"What is going on? What did you mean by your demon's getting stronger? I could use some damn answers over here Kuro." Mahiru addressed roughly.

"Mahiru-"

"Let me finish! I am really worried about you right now. I want to be able to help you but in order for me to do that I need you to let me in and give me some answers to my many q-"

"Mahiru! I really don't want to speak about it right now. It's too troublesome..." I sighed.

"Kuro..?" He looked me in the eyes this time.

"It's nothing for you to be concerned about Mahi. Just let me handle it and everything will be alright... Ok?" I said.

A pause before his reply. "Ok. But promise me I'll be the first to know if something happens to you for some reason?"

"That's a promise I can make." I faked a smile.

Mahiru smiled in return before sipping his tea and flipping through the T.V channels.

* * *

 The Next Day At School

...Hyde's POV...

* * *

 

Licht and I arrived at the group's meeting place first today. We chose to wait on a nearby bench until we saw some of the others. During that time I wanted to cuddle next to my boyfriend so that's exactly what I did. As Licht took out his phone, I took out mine and lay my head on his lap. He didn't seem to mind so I smiled. I looked him in the eyes to see him smiling back.

"You're smiling," I said calmly.

"Huh. Guess I am." He chuckled before gently placing a kiss on my forehead. I blushed furiously at his action.

"Don't get used to the lovey-dovey side of me now Hedgehog!" Licht said to me almost bursting out in a fit of laughter.

"I'll keep that in mind," I replied with a smirk.

"Barf!" I lifted my head off of my boyfriend's lap and looked to see three boys our age walking past. Two were snorting and laughing while the third one was just walking along with them almost looking like he hated his friends.

"Tch. What assholes." I heard Licht say.

I just nod my head and lay my head back down on his lap, waiting for our friends.


	6. Some Sad News

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE DON'T KILL ME FOR THIS!

* * *

I'll just get straight to the point. I'm not going to be able to continue this story. Though I absolutely adore Servamp and it's characters, I just can't come up with any more ideas for this story. My brain is dead... However! If somebody who is a good writer would like to take over this story for me- I would be up for that. I'd read it all and everything. It, of course, wouldn't be on this account though! Here are my rules if you want to finish the book for me :)

* * *

  * You must keep the first 4 chapters the same! Meaning that you copy and paste to your writing. Also, I ask that you keep the story title the same.
  * You must have my permission to continue the story for me! If I notice that you did not have my permission I will take matters into my own hands.
  * Try to keep the story around the theme of mental health..? 
  * Finally, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE keep all the character's I added and don't leave ANY out.



* * *

 If you have any further questions feel free to ask. I don't bite, I promise! 


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